Oh dear. John Green has my heart, you guys. If the Fault In Our Stars was sad, then this book is it’s perfect antidote and in the sweetest way possible. The first page had me laughing in an airport. The first page. It’s such honest, good sarcastic and smart humor. Of course, brains are definitely something it took to write this book as a major part of the plot is child prodigy Colin Singleton attempting to develop a mathematical formula to predict the route of relationships; who becomes the dumper and dumpee in the event of the relationship’s end. You see, near genius Colin Singleton had at the start of the book dated and being dumped by nineteen girls, and the catch? All of them were named Katherine. As the book states, not Kathy, not Rhyn, not Rhyna, not Kate, not Catherine, but Katherine.
This book stole my heart from the very beginning and did not ‘fall my hand’ the entire way through. Like I already said, the protagonist is a gifted child with a love for anagramming. He started to read on his own when he was two. He enjoys studying because everything interests him. You know how you remember someone’s name because it sounds funny? This is the way Colin’s memory works except everything is fascinating to him. I did consider bringing him to life to help with med school, but, if wishes were horses. *insert sigh*. But you know good things come at a price and for Colin that price is his social skills and the fact that as much as people find his brain fascinating, they do not find all his fact telling interesting enough to keep them and I believe this is the reason a lot of the Katherines did not work out. He does finally find a best friend, Hassan who is the funniest fictional character I’ve ever encountered and he becomes comic relief in the book.
This book teaches that life is not about becoming someone who “matters” in the world. It’s about the little moments; those in which nothing might even be happening, but they stay with us and are magical. John Green portrays friendship so beautifully and I can’t help but think he has great friends. I found it amusing that Colin and Hassan say “fug” or “fugging” in place of the F word because it makes the book easier to read, considering the number of times they use the word. Colin finds his eureka moment by means of a road trip suggested by Hassan and he figures out what’s really important in life, love and relationships. A couple of examples as to why I loved this book;
- “Colin: She dumped me.
Hassan: So I heard. Listen, sitzpinkler, I’d love to comfort you, but I could put out a house fire with the contents of my bladder right now”
2. “Colin had always preferred baths; one of his general policies in life was never to do anything standing up that could just as easily be done lying down”
I mean, that’s just wisdom. Why stand when you can sit? *shrugs*
I still have some amazing quotes;
Prodigies can very quickly learn what other people have already figured out; geniuses discover that which no one has ever previously discovered… Prodigies learn; geniuses do.
He liked all books, because he liked the mere act of reading, the magic of turning scratches on a page into words inside his head.
He’d be famous. And none of them ever would. That’s why, his mom said, they made fun of him in the first place. “They’re just jealous,” she said. But Colin knew better. They weren’t jealous. He just wasn’t likable. Sometimes it’s that simple.
isn’t it interesting how a lot of good politicians, like Churchill and also Gandhi, were bald while (8) a lot of evil dictators, like Hitler and Stalin and Saddam Hussein, were mustachioed?
“Everywhere man blames nature and fate, yet his fate is mostly but the echo of his character and passions, his mistakes and weaknesses.”
there was no denying her smile. That smile could end wars and cure cancer.
Colin Singleton’s distance from his glasses made him realize the problem: myopia. He was nearsighted. The future lay before him, inevitable but invisible
It rather goes without saying that Katherine drank her coffee black. Katherines do, generally. They like their coffee like they like their ex-boyfriends: bitter.
Colin didn’t like coffee. He liked the idea of coffee quite a lot—a warm drink that gave you energy and had been for centuries associated with sophisticates and intellectuals. But coffee itself tasted to him like caffeinated stomach bile
You can love someone so much, he thought. But you can never love people as much as you can miss them.
The past, like Lindsey had told him, is a logical story. It’s the sense of what happened. But since it is not yet remembered, the future need not make any fugging sense at all.
The future will erase everything—there’s no level of fame or genius that allows you to transcend oblivion. The infinite future makes that kind of mattering impossible.
Nothing was happening, really, but the moment was thick with mattering
I WANT TO QUOTE MORE! But I have to stop. *sigh
This book was a ten out of ten which somehow mathematically means five stars. Hey, I’m no mathematical genius. Lord knows I didn’t get a lot of the math jargon but John Green was gracious enough to include an appendix explaining Colin’s formula. I think y’all math geniuses will love it.
So yes, read this book. I give my blessings.