Exam Week 2
Hello hello.. How are you guys? I hope everyone is feeling great. In one word my week was nerve racking BUT I have ONE more week of exams and I couldn’t be happier! (Except maybe after I’m done) and by one more week I mean five more exams. I wrote two papers this week, one of which was an emergency exam which I only passed by God’s grace, but more on that later. I posted this week also; about my love for blogging (and writing), a sort of thriller, crime kind of short story (or at least that’s what I attempted to do) titled ‘Mandy’ and a poem about Love. Oh and I tweaked my blog…just a bit as you may have already noticed. As usual I learned a few lessons this week and like the lovely person I am, I’m going to share.
–Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: I’m giving her her own subtitle because my love for her grew in leaps and bounds this week. Lord knows I watch so many videos of her, she’s my older sister in my head. So I watched a lot of videos but my brain has become slightly porous I can’t remember everything she said but I did keep a couple of quotes in my head;
Don’t you dare believe other people’s stories of you.
Those words are so important to me because, I hate to be stereotyped, put in a box, expected to react a certain way every time. This is the reason why my mother annoys me sometimes; she knows me so well, it’s unnerving. And sometimes even when she may not be right, she refuses to believe otherwise, then I really get upset. Well that’s just an example. No one is a perfect temperament; everyone is a mixture of some kind and so people are unpredictable, even when you know them very well. This is why trust is such a strong emotion and relationships can only function when trust exceeds doubt. So, be you and do not let someone’s (except God of course) opinion of you or who you should be determine your action and especially try not to react in a way you wouldn’t just out of rebellion against stereotyping, because some people do know us better than we know ourselves.
As events unfold in our lives, we do not always know what they mean, but in telling the story of what happened, meaning emerges and we are able to make connections with emotive significance.
This quote is the reason why I do my weekly journals. During the week, I live in a haze, wake, school, study, sleep and of course many food breaks. I argue with my group mates, I observe people’s mannerisms and attitudes and I learn so much, a lot of which I forget by Friday, but a few things make this blog post and then when I write about them, as I am writing I discover lessons, like dark brown strands woven with black hair strands. Taking a step back is always good and this is what I love about writing.
–Be Fully Aware of Your Abilities: Now as a self confirmed pessimist, I tend to see things as worse than they really are. I underestimate myself and my abilities. I beat myself up about mistakes that imperfect people are prone to making. But it truly upsets me when I see people in such a cloud about themselves and their abilities. Their abilities are repeatedly proven to them and yet they refuse to accept them and learn to work with them and on getting better. They instead choose to dig in their heels in what is not resilience but a rather simple case of self deceit. You cannot solve a problem until you realize the problem exists. So be realistic. Get realistic friends and family who are unafraid to tell you the truth and pull you up after you ego is bruised. Self deceit only sends you backward.
– Unapologetic: I’m not talking about Rihanna’s album. I’m talking about something else I really like about Chimamanda. Yes, she seeped in here too. God help me. I don’t agree with every single thing she says or every policy she advocates, but I love that she says it all and she does not apologize for feeling a certain way about the things she’s passionate about. I’m that girl who gives her opinion and then says ‘I’m sorry’. I apologize for not liking things other people like, for not believing in the things others do and for not being the way some people want me to be. That ends here. And now. I’m going to be unapologetic about myself, my religious beliefs, my choice of words, my love for writing, for my friends and for being who I am (I will not apologize for saying that twice). I will also try to stop apologizing for loving Chimamanda even though I’ve never met her.
– Quotes: I’m honestly becoming quote obsessive. I found this one this week;
“If your body is a house that even you refuse to live in, why would anyone else ask to move in?“– Warsan Shire