How was your week? Better than mine? I’m guessing so too. I had a hell-a-cious week! It started out pretty awesome, school was going great, I even got this really cool award thing that made me feel like my week was going to be awesome and I posted my first short story which you can read here. Did I already mention my TTGMG (Things that Grind My Gears) post on kemmiiii’s blog here where I basically talk about all the things that annoy me. So you see, my week seemed like it was going pretty great and I was in a good mood. On Wednesday though, my mood dropped like a skydiver whose parachute thing had been cut off. I simply felt angry at the world for no good reason. Well, I had a good reason. School was being sucky. I wasn’t doing badly, just annoyingly below my expectations. It was frustrating. Still is. But I’m learning that the pursuit of perfection can be frustrating . Sometimes, it’s enough to do your best, as long as you’re sure its your best (long highlight, I know). But, I’m learning. I’m trying to not let little frustrations make me lose joy or lose sight of the bigger picture (should I highlight this too?) You’ll find out why my grades for two days would seem like a little thing.
On Thursday, the very worst thing happened. I lost my wallet aka ” my significant other”. The thing had MY LIFE in it! And the way I found out? Completely heartbreaking. So, after my Therapy class, learning about blood pressure measurement and listening for diastolic and systolic pressures, my teacher basically said to buy a stethoscope and portable sphygmomanometer. And there I was in the little drugstore, telling the lady at the counter what I wanted- said equipment and Strepsils for my sore throat . She brought out what I’d ordered and I looked into my hand bag and guess what? NO WALLET. I searched frantically and still nothing. I knew I hadn’t left it at home, but self deceit is cradling. I smiled and excused myself after mumbling something in Russian about forgetting my wallet. Upon getting home, I ransacked my hand bag and room. And nothing. NO WALLET. I saw red lights. No, seriously. Bright red. After close to thirty minutes of searching, I gave up and accepted defeat. I was in a state of shock. You see, I may have lost some things, but my wallet, never in my short lifetime. So, I did what I do when I’m depressed. I slept. Six hours of troubled sleep. And suddenly, it did not matter that I’d been having a nasty week already, my wallet was gone. With all my bank cards and store discount cards. Heartbreaking. I’m not ashamed to say I may have shed a tear or two.
It’s funny how losing certain things can make you realize that worrying over certain things isn’t even worth it. Now, I’m not saying school is unimportant, because it is. Very. But everyone has off days. Some days are better than others. Some weeks are better than others. We’re human. We all like to think we’re superhuman. We’re not. We’re heavily flawed humans. We get angry, frustrated and things don’t always work out the way we plan. So we keep going. We make sure we’re giving it a hundred percent and leave the perfect Person above to do the rest. Because, as hard to believe as it may seem, things could very well be worse. So, I’m recovering from the loss of my dear wallet and resources. I’ve cancelled all associated bank cards. Another thing: when in rough straits be proactive. It’s really all you can do. I mean, we all need our grieving period- eat, sleep, cry- whatever you do to feel better. But, you’ve gotta work to correct things and make the situation better. And then, put it behind you. Dance to your favorite songs, sing at the top of your voice and be happy. Ain’t nobody got time to wallow. In case you didn’t notice, I’m all better now. My heart still lurches when I think of my wallet, but it’ll get better.
On a lighter note, I wrote another short story on the bus yesterday, seeing the great response my first story got and you’ll all be seeing it soon. And everyone who asked for a part two, it’s coming, as soon as I decide how I want the story to end. Thanks for all the love and support, especially the wordpress community. I’m grateful. I need to get the rest of my weekend rolling now. Have a fab one! xx